Invitations: A Deployment Project. Update #2

Now, it’s important to understand that I had been warning the kids not to touch the little bowls of the candy decoration all afternoon.

“Don’t even think about it!”  As I shoo their hand away “those are for decorating!”

Why is it important to know that?

Because while we were putting up the carousal foundation, our guest grabbed a candy from the bowl and ate it.

So Monster…..smacked him.

Thankfully, Dh still has a job.

The next Sunday, our dinner hour was taken up by not one dinner guest, but instead 10 of them.  Age 7 and under.  It was Monster’s birthday party!

We had (of course) a Ninja Turtles Themed party.  We made Ninja Turtles Christmas ornaments (thank you pintrest) and had Ninja Turtle Cupcakes (no thanks, Pintrest, all your ideas were wayyyy above my league).

About 20 minutes into the party, a surprise guest came.

One of our past dinner guests, PJ, came bearing gifts and stuck around to hang out with the partiers.

Now, the poor guy is in his early 20s and I was on my own with a dozen screaming 7 year olds.  So he may not be having any children for a good long while (sorry PJ’s fiance).

I think he assumed other parents would be there, but what he didn’t realize is after a certain age, parents just start kicking kids out the door of the car for birthday parties and enjoying their hour or 2 of freedom.

So PJ and I helped with crafts and served cupcakes.

The kids started arguing about who was oldest.  Finally Monster said “My mom is oldest!” 

Then another kid said “what about that guy?”

To which Freckles replied “he’s WAY younger than my mom.” (Thanks, kid).

Then a little girl next to me asks “So…. are you and him………?”

Now, I’m not sure what ……. means to a seven year old, but while I was trying to think of a response to that, Monster piped up

“No, but my dad is gone right now.  So…..”

Sigh.

This is how I envision some rides home having gone:

Parent: “So, were you a good boy/girl and listened to his mom and dad?”

Kid: “Well, his dad’s gone but it’s okay because there was a guy there that comes over when he’s away.”

That can only end well, right?

When everyone was gone Drama asked:

“I know PJ likes Ninja Turtles a lot (this is not an exaggeration, his sleeve tattoo including all 4 plus Shredder and Casey Jones speaks for itself), but why was he here for the party? Did he know it was just kids?”

Monster replied “because he’s my friend and that’s what friends do, they come to your parties.”

The next week saw a new guest, a local radio personality and news director.

While I have heard his voice a lot since he is on the station I usually listen to, I had never met Matt in person.

As we sat to eat, at one point the topic came up of what it was like growing up with Rheumatoid Arthritis.

As such a positive person, this was not the focal point of any conversation, just simply a fact.  One that had clearly been accepted and overcome with strength and perseverance.  We decorated cookies (because I make my guests work for dessert) and laughed about music tastes and radio station choices, about provinces and weather and journalism.

After dinner ended and he’d left for home, my kids asked

“What’s Rolaid Arthrigis.”

We googled it together, even though I knew, so they could look up all they wanted and understand as best they could something they did not have to experience.

Freckles said “this sounds like it hurts a lot.”

Then Drama said “you can’t tell that when you hear him on the radio.”

I said “when someone meets you, can they tell that your heart is sad sometimes because your dad is gone?”

And there was a realization in their eyes and their hearts that I couldn’t have taught them by reading a book or taking a class.

That in their big community, everyone is fighting their own battles, and we usually can’t see what they are just by looking at them.

That there is so much to learn about each person, that there’s a value in taking the time to really get to know those you interact with and share in their challenges and their victories.

That when you invest in your community and the people in it, you learn about their strength, and their resiliency.  About their ability to lead an entire Division that is paralleled only by their ability to lead 3 sugar high kids to create a gingerbread masterpiece.  Their ability to flourish in different cities, provinces and countries with quiet dignity.  Their ability to be more than an illness trying to hold them back and instead be that voice that now causes my kids to say “that’s OUR FRIEND” every time they hear him on the radio.

Their willingness to be the coolest and tallest friend at a 7 year old kid’s birthday party.

So far in 7 weeks of Deployment Project dinners, community has been the best part of the lesson.