The Drama is Born

There are many things Drama had going for her before she was even conceived.  She, for starters, is the only child that my dh and I actually made a conscious choice to have.  For the other two, well, we have heard everything from ‘unexpected blessing’, ‘wonderful accident’ and ‘special suprise’.  Let’s be honest, people.  The other two were not our idea.  But Drama, our gift of Drama was the only time us and God had the same idea about us having a child.  And I trust when she gets old enough to know that, she will rub it in her brothers faces at every opportunity.

Also on her side – my dh had just returned from his second tour when we decided to try for our second.  That meant he had a stretch of time at home, or at least in country.  So Drama’s is the only pregnancy my dh has experienced up close.  The only time he would be able to attend ultrasounds, doctors appointments, and experience the cravings and all-around bitchiness that is me, pregnant.  Shocking that he didn’t stick around for the 3rd….

You may say

I have never seen cute pregnancy pictures with all her belly out and looking all glowing….

That’s because those moments did not exist.  I looked like a beach ball with legs.  Swollen legs.  And the only glow I had was nausea.  So no cutesy pie preggers pics for me.  In fact, even looking for any pregnancy pics of me I had a hard time finding any, and considering I have been pregnant for a total of 110 weeks of my life, that’s impressive that I avoided the camera that well.  But trust me, there was nothing to see.

So after a regular pregnancy with some blood pressure monitoring and nothing serious, at 35 weeks I found myself with my dh on a training exercise and going into labour.  Contraction, pain.  5 cm dilation.  Baby’s coming. For the 2nd time, I inform my doctor I will not be having a baby until my husband is home, though that’s a week or more away.  A kind and wonderful Warrant Officer overhears my husband over the phone to me and petitions the Sgt. Major.  And dh comes home.  Baby should be here at any time!  We are admitted to the hospital that Thursday night.

But Drama would have none of coming into this world without drama.  So while I reach one more centimeter and the contractions continue, nothing else happens over night.  Some demented nurse firmly believes that I am somehow causing all this myself just because I don’t want to be pregnant any longer.  Trust me, if I could dilate my own cervix at will I would have written a book about it and made a million dollars from desperate over-due mamas.    But in the wonder of rural hospitals,  you are not allowed to deliver there until you are 36 weeks as they are not set up to handle neo-natal intensive care.  And I am several days short.  So they don’t want to do anything to push me along and instead, send me home during the day Friday.  I make dh take the careseat and baby bag out before I go so I don’t have to see it.  

I have to spend the next 2 days driving the 40 minutes to the hospital twice a day for observation since I am considered in ‘active labour’.  Every wonderful nurse I see tried to break my water while checking me.  But it is to no use.  That Saturday, I take my son to a Halloween party we had tickets to.  He is dressed as Rufus, the Naked Mole Rat from Kim Possible in a costume made beautifully by a friend.  And since my families costumes always match, Nathan is Ron Stoppable and I am Kim Possible.  A pregnant and labouring Kim Possible.  Not a very good role model, but thankfully, I opted against the signature halter-top.

The next morning we send Caleb to church with friends as we head to our pilgrimage to the hospital for my labour check up.  And surprisingly after 3 days of labour my blood pressure is really high.  So they agree to break my water and get on with it.

Finally baby is coming.  I get an epidural but feel no pain relief.  About halfway through pushing we hear a nurse comment  ‘did anyone turn the drip on?’  

No.  In fact no one had.  All the wonderful epidural needle experience, no pain relief.  Excellent.

After 4 days of labour, Drama is born. The doctor has not made it there.  So the nurse and Resident deliver.  And the delivery might be the reason that resident does not pursue a career in Obstetrics.

Drama is not breathing well.  She is bright purple and making no noise though her eyes are wide open.  Pulling out the suction machine they get the tubes down her throat and turn it on and…. nothing.  The machine is not working.  At this point, the resident freezes.  With a look of complete shock, he holds my turning-darker-purple-by-the-second baby and stands frozen.  I have no idea what’s happening but dh said it seemed like forever though it was probably only seconds.  A nurse grabs her and takes her to the next room where she is suctioned out.  

You may notice – hey, she’s still purple.  That’s what the pediatrician on calls says when he gets there.  And that adorable sighing noise she makes with each breath, he’s not too keen on that either.  She may have been very close to 36 weeks gestation, but her lungs are not ready for the outside.  And all of a sudden a neo-natal transfer unit is there and I find myself in the hospital having given birth but with no baby with me.  I have to wait until morning when I sign papers to leave against medical advice and agree to meet my doctor at some point in the hospital to deal with the lingering blood pressure issues.  I do it cause that’s what you do as a mom to see your child, my daughter, who is now a resident of the NICU. With  monitors and an IV that over the course of her time there would move from one arm to the other, to both legs and eventually to the top of her head. 

When we arrive in the morning I find her in an incubator, a soother the size of half her face in her mouth.  And for the next week I live at the hospital in one of the rooms provided for moms (coincidentally, these rooms look exactly like military shack, not that I have ever seen inside one of those) and go through doctors rounds, car seat test and the constant incessant beeping of the monitors until I want to go crazy! 

The reason she keeps having to stay – when she doesn’t like what’s happening, she stops breathing.  And we are given a foreshadowing of the Drama.  She started it at hours old.

I feel very blessed that it was only a week.  I have much compassion for moms who are there weeks and sometimes months with their premature little ones. In fact, a friend of mine delivered her 29 week, 2lb 5 oz  little miracle the day after Drama and they were in the NICU at the same time, a constant reminder to me that I had much to be thankful for.   Now that adorable little boy is almost 5 too, and much bigger than Drama 😀
I also thank God that this baby had her daddy home with her, going through that alone would have been overwhelming.  And I was immeasurably blessed that after a week we took home a healthy baby girl.

The most amazing physical feature of Drama; the one we were stopped wherever we went because of;

She has mostly grown into her eyes.  Mostly.  

And tomorrow, my beautiful bug-eyed alien baby, my only daughter, turns 5.  

And she’s an amazing 5 year old.  A loud, shreeky, overly-dramatic and accident prone 5 year old.  But a beautiful little girl who prays for her friends every night, remembering every little prayer request and illness, and will hug and kiss you forever. She had no gifts given to her at her party last week and instead donated the money raised to our 3 sponsored children in Uganda.  Her eyes light up whenever she sees her daddy.  And bless her heart, while all my kids have a ‘daddy bear’ that has a uniform on and a recording of dh’s voice when you press it’s paw, she is the only child who asked to make a Mommy Bear too, which she takes everywhere and dresses in ridiculous outfits that make me wonder what she thinks of my fashion sense.

She’s has both her daddy and her older brother wrapped around her little finger, which is her right as the only little girl.  For Halloween, she is going as a Spanish Princess so that she can be the ‘damsel in distress’ for her 2 Zorro brothers to protect. She is, in every way, a tiny little princess with a huge attitude in her 30lb frame. 

So Happy Birthday princess.  Mommy loves you.

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