Deployment Dinner Project Update: Easter

Here in my house, pity parties are not allowed to last the night.

Sure,
it’s okay sometimes to sit with your glass of wine and your bag ‘o
chocolate and moan because you’re doing it on your own again, or because
you’re little family won’t be complete at Christmas, or because not one
child will have dad home for their birthday this year…..

but then you pick your bloated, wine filled ass off that couch and you pull yourself together.

Life
moves on.  And sometimes pulling yourself together just involves enough
energy for yoga pants and wiping the grime from the toilet before
someone thinks there’s a frat house using your bathroom.

But it’s still progress.

In my house, we move forward because experience has taught me nothing gets better if you’re waiting for the ideal moment to try.

So last fall when Dh left I decided we wouldn’t be sitting on our butt waiting for
community to magically appear and make this 4th deployment easier.

We were going to make community.

Inspired by Sarah Smiley and her book, we started our Invitations Deployment Project.

Each Sunday, we invite someone new for dinner.

Each Sunday, we have a new chance to expand our community.

You can see previous months here: https://www.sheisfierce.net/deployment-project/

Well, as Easter approached we didn’t have a dinner lined up as most people had family plans. That’s when I found the “Meet a Muslim” project and signed our family up.

I was contacted by Noor Ul Sabah and Tahir Ahmed Mirza and were invited to have dinner with their family Easter Sunday. He had not realized what day that was since it wouldn’t be part of his traditions, but to us, it was such a blessing to have somewhere to be on our holiday.

Tahir was a graduate student at the local university and lived in student housing along with his wife who was on break from her studies home with their young children, and his mother. After dinner we were joined by Tahir’s brother and sister in law who were visiting from Montreal.

I gorged on korma and biryani that we ate from a communal platter on the table, and we talked.

We talked about their studies (entirely over my head), their travel, their work. All the women present were just as educated and equally engaged in the conversation as their husbands were.

We talked about their faith, and ours. They asked sincerely about the significance of Easter to me as a Christian and explained some of the tenants of their own Ismaili Muslim faith and how it differed from other Islamic beliefs. They answered all my questions, even some that might have been simplistic or just plain ignorant, with honest happiness at the opportunity to help me understand.

We talked about Dh’s job, how I had been worried they might be put off or even offended by the fact he was at the time deployed fighting (they were not, the very opposite actually) and how I wanted to be sure my children did not grow up misunderstanding who the enemy was.

They shared how they were part of a group that had started a successful program in local universities to reach Islamic students at risk of being recruted by extremists, and their frustration that the media never shared those positive stories of their community.

We talked about how much colder it feels in Canada when you grew up in Pakistan.

Our kids played.

I drank too much Pakistani tea.

And when it was time to head home, I asked if I could take a photo and so the women covered their heads, and Drama asked if she could wear the pretty scarf too and crawled right up on a friendly grandmother’s lap without hesitation.

Love starts over dinner, friends.

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Invitations: A Deployment Project. Update #2 Invitations: A Deployment Project Update Invitations: An Inspired Deployment Project Tigers, weight gain, and what I accomplished this deployment.