read more posts by
reccewife
This blog series is called Why Can’t We All Just Get Along What that means, is that sometimes we tend to turn life into a big loser contest, where we figure we have it harder than everyone else. Especially on Military forums and support groups. We judge the experiences of different branches, different bases, different families, and we argue over who has it worse. Let’s not anymore, okay? So in this series, I have some amazing guest bloggers who have written me what it’s like to walk a mile in their shoes. The good and the bad. Because all our struggles and victories may be different, but that doesn’t make them any less valid. And for my readers who are not military, it’s a chance to see how unique each military family is and what their day to day life is like! Before each blogger, I am going to take a moment to answer a question from you guys about what it’s like to be a Canadian military spouse. And the best part is, commenting and asking a question enters you into a draw for Canadian Maple Syrup candies! When the series is all done, I will use random.org to pick one of our question-askers as the winner of the candies :). A Canadian Contest So today’s question comes from Lauren Cecora (Lauren, please message me your email so I can contact you if you win), she asked How different are the uniforms? Not a whole lot, I don’t think. Most soldiers (and some sailors and airman day to day) wear Cadpat. That’s the name of the Canadian Disruptive Pattern…
This blog series is called Why Can’t We All Just Get Along What that means, is that sometimes we tend to turn life into a big loser contest, where we figure we have it harder than everyone else. Especially on Military forums and support groups. We judge the experiences of different branches, different bases, different families, and we argue over who has it worse. Let’s not anymore, okay? So in this series, I have some amazing guest bloggers who have written me what it’s like to walk a mile in their shoes. The good and the bad. Because all our struggles and victories may be different, but that doesn’t make them any less valid. And for my readers who are not military, it’s a chance to see how unique each military family is and what their day to day life is like! Before each blogger, I am going to take a moment to answer a question from you guys about what it’s like to be a Canadian military spouse. And the best part is, commenting and asking a question enters you into a draw for Canadian Maple Syrup candies! When the series is all done, I will use random.org to pick one of our question-askers as the winner of the candies :). A Canadian Contest Our first question is from Crystal: There are 5 branches of the military here. How many are there in Canada? In the Canadian Armed Forces, there is the Canadian Army, The Royal Canadian Air Force and the Royal Canadian Navy. Each branch has their own reserve unit. Unlike American and British forces, we do not have Marines. And while we do…
After I wrote my post on Monday, I was wasting time on facebook and came across a Canadian Military group I check out now and again. I joined to advertise family support events at one time, and I can;t say I’ve ever commented or posted anything, but I admit I check it out when I am lurking. Which happens more now that I’m here and don’t know anyone in real life…. Anyhoo, the topic was a change in some funding for military families, but the comments, well, they weren’t about that at all. They were one big pissing contest of how much harder each base had it. How much harder each military branch had it. There was no supporting anymore. Only a power struggle. Except the power was over who had the most expensive cost of living/most frequent deployments/hardest time finding work/etc. And hey, each one had points. Some cities are more expensive to live in and much harder for a spouse who wants to work to find a job. Some cost less to live in but are far from family and friends. Some are welcoming to military families, other’s less so. Some branches of the military deploy more frequently, some deploy into more dangerous regions and some deploy longer than others. Some people don’t have children and fee isolated. Some people have young kids and feel trapped. Some have special needs kids and feel no support. Some have teenagers and feel like they are fighting a battle every day. Some are empty nesters and feel like there’s nothing left just for them. All of these are real struggles from…
Well, pretty soon I’m going to have a new layout and a new blog name, thanks to Utterly Chaotic. I am so excited! So in preparation, I would like to write a blog where I let you in on life as a Canadian, as opposed to American, Military family. http://www.google.ca/imgres Because most of my readers are American and people have tweeted and emailed and commented some crazy questions to me…. being that our new base is less than 2 hours from the closest American base (Fort Drum), I feel like I could learn a little about you, too! So please ask something so I have something to say! It could be about security, shopping, pay, rank structure, deployments, socialization, etc. You don’t have to be an American Military spouse to ask, anyone can! And the question doesn’t have to be military either, do you have questions about Health Care, poutine, igloos, or the proper use of the word ‘hoser?’ (OK, about that last one… I have questions about that, too….) So think up something serious or funny to ask me and get to it! If you are a military spouse, feel free to let me in on a little part of your world, too. Do you live on base? Do you pay for housing? Do you shop at the Commissary? Do you have to use ID to get to your house? See, I have a ton of questions too! Consider this a ‘get to know your neighbour’ segment, and I can learn something about your country that isn’t from Honey Boo Boo or your election commercials. As I realized I have just as…
I like to play favorites with my kids. I like to say things like ‘You’re my favorite oldest son.’ ‘You’re my favorite daughter.’ ‘You’re my favorite kid in this room right now.’ Or, more simply, ‘you are my favorite kid named insert child’s name here‘. Eventually Freckles got wise. He started to say ‘But I’m you’re ONLY one!’. Which I could have laughed at and left. Because how terrible would it be if we then told him that actually we had at least half a dozen test Freckle’s before him who live under the stairs because they didn’t meet standard? I mean, a good parent wouldn’t tease their child that if they keep annoying them they’ll just put him with the ‘other Frecke’s’ and try again. So obviously, that has never happened….. …… When Freckles was born, he had a slight disadvantage from the other kids. I was his mom. And I had never held a baby before. I had never fed a baby. Never changed a baby. Never cuddled or comforted or spent even 1 minute trying to convince a baby to stop crying. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. After Freckles was born I made DH show me how to change a diaper quickly while the nurses were out of the room so they wouldn’t think I was incompetent. My inexperience didn’t stop me in any way from judging other parents, mind you. Oh, I judged. And when I saw those posters advocating against shaking your baby, I thought ‘…
After moving here a friend I have known before who was posted here a year earlier, she asked me how I can be so eloquent about the things I write about, how I don’t get mad like she does, or how it sounds like I can just roll with everything that comes my way. And I laughed. And laughed. This, this here on this computer screen? This isn’t reality. We all have different days. Some days you are telling the world that 7 months isn’t that long and it will be over soon enough. And other days you are already having a mid-deployment meltdown at 2 weeks when the washing machine breaks and the car needs repairs and your son just poured a bag of pebbles down the kitchen sink. Some days you know that you can take on the birthday party by yourself with one hand tied behind your back. Sure. Invite more kids. Bring it on. And other days you are hiding in a bathroom from 15 kids on a sugar crazed rampage in your own home cursing him for not being there to help. Some days you are telling the kids how big of an adventure it is they are getting to take and how fast they will make new friends. And other days you are having a hard time getting out of bed because you hate every single thing about a city that you haven’t even given a chance. Some days you are hugging your DH and smiling at him and telling him that you wouldn’t have it any other way, that it’s not a big deal, that you can do this, that it’s…
Fun facts about DH as he turns 31… – He loves Van Morrison. It drives me nuts because the hard drive of our van has a bunch of Van Morrison songs on it, which is jarring when you go from Skillet to ‘Brown Eye’d Girl.’ And for the record, I have blue eyes. – He wear slippers all the time and, more importantly/disturbingly, he brings them with him places to wear at other peoples houses! Are we 80? ‘Hey, what’s in your purse?’ “oh, pardon me, that’s just my husbands slippers.” – The only thing that make him look older from 10 years ago is desert sand induced eye wrinkles. And they only make him look sexier. – He’s the one who wanted my daughter’s ears pierced. Because I shaved her head when she was 3 and had lice. Since then she’s just had very short curly hair. I think to him he feels like the earrings make up for the hair. – This weekend, he made us watch the new Footloose on Netflix. That’s all I’m going to say about that. – Speaking of Netflix, I secretly email TopGear begging them not to update their seasons on there for fear of losing my husband again. –He has never had a cavity. Ever. I not so secretly hate him for that. – He enlisted at 17. He was married at 19. He went to Afghanistan for the first time when he was 20. He had his first child 9 days after he turned 21. He had three tours to Afghanistan and…
Sometimes, it’s hard to put into words what something meant to you. And for that reason, people like me who suck at emotion just leave somewhere they lived for 9 years, the friends they had and the church they were a part of…. without giving a real goodbye. Because goodbyes are hard. What’s less hard? Just ignoring them. But now that I’ve had the chance to sit and I’m not ‘there’ where people are going to see me get all annoyingly weepy, I think I do have some words. Have you watched The Princess Bride? If you have lived under a rock your ENTIRE LIFE and have not, stop reading this and right this very instant go and watch it. Right now. Go. If you (like the rest of the free world who have seen any move, ever) have, you will remember that Wesley says this: “This is true love. Do you think that happens every day?” imbd.com This past year, a friend of mine had his closer-than-a-father grandpa pass away suddenly. And during the hospital visits and funeral preparations, my friend gave me a call. She wasn’t going to make it home when her kids got off the bus. So I drove to her house and did her dishes while I waited for her kids got off the bus. When they did, the looked at me in their kitchen and they said: “Hi Auntie Kim” Then they walked downstairs. When I called them up and told them to pack a bag to stay with me a few days, they said ok and we left. And…
Last night I looked over at DH and said “I have nothing to write on my blog. Possibly ever again.” He said “I’m sure you’ll learn something from this”. I said “Screw you I will not. There’s nothing to learn. Just shut up.” Which is what I do when he says things that are true. Since the last time I wrote, we moved across the country. There’s plenty I am sure I will write about the amusing anecdotes of our driving across Canada and the northern US on the way to our new home. Our fifth night after leaving the house, I was annoyed with Freckles. He wasn’t eating his meals. Now, my kids are picky, obnoxious eaters who eat next to nothing. I am judged everywhere I go (mostly by myself) for their lack of eating. So as we start on our trip, my one child who has almost started to eat like a normal person, won’t eat. Then, one night looking at him while visiting on our trip with my parents, I realize something. He’s trying so hard to act okay, he’s such a happy kid, I didn’t even think. He’s hidden every other symptom but the truth is, well… He’s sad. Sad enough that he hasn’t realized it, but he doesn’t feel like eating because of it. And two things hit me. The first is that when you realize that what your child is doing is not defiant or obnoxious or spiteful or lazy but a symptom of his overwhelming sadness….. It’s…
When he was 17 and in high school, DH started his enlistment for the Canadian Forces. He and I started dating right around that same time. Though his top choice on his papers was Engineer, he didn’t think twice about taking his 2nd choice when they called on his 18th birthday at 9 a.m. and offered him a job in the Armoured Corps. 6 months later after all his training was complete, he found himself a part of the unti he has served with the past 12 years.. I can’t say either of us give much thought to the decisions he made and the decisions made for him that brought him to this unit. It’s just always been how it ended up. He’s always been proud to be a Strathcona. And if you don’t mind me putting on my lame rah-rah wife thing for a moment, I’m going to go ahead and let you know – every one of them has every reason to be proud. The past 10 years has seen this unit in Afghanistan over and over again. The first Canadian boots on the ground in Kandahar included theirs. Since then they have served in Kandahar and Kabul, with Reconnaissance Squadrons and with Tank squadrons, consistently and frequently and with honour. In fact, since the war began you would be hard-pressed to find a month when there was not at least one LdSH(RC) squadron in Afghanistan. Even now that Canada has left the combat role, Strathconas still serve as mentors and liaisons and instructors to the Afghan army. The Strathconas have been one of the most deployed Regiment in the war. A few months…
